Hold me down

I finally have found myself a proper app to blog from. I happened to remember I now rock an HTC Raider and its an Android phone. *squee*

Lately I've been a little bit out of my head... Kind of like happiness is just out of my reach and sanity is about as easy to hold onto as water. I have determined I'm excessively unhappy with my job and my home. Thankfully I only have a few more months to go until I fly away to Ottawa so I can start living again.

I am living in my iPod lately, just trying to keep away from the people and places that scare the shit out of me. I figure in the choice between signing into the 3rd floor and keeping my brain plugged into my music 24/7, there is an obvious choice. I feel a little like I'm lost in a life that isn't mine and its a little frightening.

Right now I'm glad for the people I have around me, particularly the tiny humans. My cousin Josie is one of the reasons I hold it all together. My aunt held it together for me when I needed her and I now have the opportunity to return that favour for that beautiful little girl who makes me go to a pile of mush when she smiles. Dancing with her until I feel like my feet are going to fall off and my back might break makes me the happiest person on the planet.

I got to see my adorable niece and 2 nephews again. They are getting so big lately and I wish I was around more often. Caroline is the tiniest little being I have ever seen. She is so dainty but totally going to be braver than her brothers. Zack and Carter both are sweet little boys but definitely not the kind to play in the mud or swim in a lake... But I adore them all the same.

Surprisingly my favourite person as of late would have to be the demon child. Yes, my kid brother. He is growing up to be a decent enough guy and he reminds me of me as a teen. A shit disturber but not a bad person. I'm proud of him, I just wish he would use his brain to get through school but like me he is naturally a slacker. It's mildly weird since Mum is our common link and I don't think slacker could be used in relation to her even a bit....

I will just be happy when I can settle down and be happy. I'm hoping this guy is going to be my forever person, however I can't know that til forever comes. If it works for the next few years when it is just us being together, I will bring my family into the mix. I think that will make it easier to determine how I feel about him and him about me. Who knows though!

Anyways, I'm headed into work but expect to see more from me more often since I now have my blogger app. Figured I'd give you a preview of my gorgeous Raider in the form of a screen shot... You know you want it!